In the C(ore) Stage of the Flow5 COACH Process, we have looked at Human Needs and Drivers and Focus and these are essential for us as Coaches to understand aspects of our Coachee's inner workings - his identity, his values and the intrinsic motivation that can transform his thoughts, beliefs, attitudes and behaviour. Purpose is another core process which is a strong motivator and in Episode 17 of the Catalyst Coaching Certification Programme Coach Joan Chepkemoi led the class through the importance of Purpose and the concept of Ikigai.
The notion to discover the reason for one's existence was brought to the fore by Garcia and Miralles' book Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life which is an international best-seller. Through interviews with centenarians living in Okinawa (a Blue Zone with a high incidence of people living past 100 years old) Garcia and Miralles identified how Purpose or ikigai can lead to a long and fulfilling life.
The Japanese word 'Iki' means "alive"and "gai" means "worth". The traditional philosophy which dates back to the Heian period of Japan focuses on finding bliss that leads to a long and fulfilling life whereas the West has interpreted ikigai to relate more closely to finding purpose through what we do. Whichever interpretation, having a purpose transforms one's life in a meaningful way as it makes experiences richer and deepens relationship. Hence accomplishments become even more rewarding and impacts our well-being. Purpose helps us to clarify our intentions and aids our decision making and ultimately serves to bring a sense of fulfilment to our lives.
Some questions to start us thinking
What do we see as our purpose?
How do we decide that this is our purpose?
Why is this important to us now?
Coach Joan discussed the hypothesis that our motivation is affected by our drive to Create and our drive to Consume. I looked into this a bit more - Studies based upon media consumption have shown on how consumption depletes our energy. Instead of being 'consuming' we are consumed (a metaphor for obsessiveness) - scrolling does not add to our knowledge and minutes and hours pass by without accomplishing very much. For some reason this leaves most people tired. On the other hand, when we engage in 'creative' tasks, even simple things like preparing a nice meal or journaling, we replenish our energies. How this relates to Purpose is that Purpose is intrinsically creative in nature - even if it is less altruistic eg if my purpose is to make a lot of money, wealth creation is creative. Caring for others is also creative in nature - while physically tiring, the reward of looking after children and the elderly can add meaning to one's life.
We then went into the concept of Ikigai where we briefly discussed how far our current goals encompassed
What we love
What we are good at
What the world needs
What you can be paid for
There is a wealth of resources on using the Ikagai as a self-reflection tool as well as a tool for coaching others. I have listed some of these sites below.
Reflections - Shifting from Theory into Practice
As coaches, we need to understand the link between purpose and meaning. Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence attributes this to the seeking system in the brain which is trying to make sense of the world and when it does, it releases dopamine, the reward chemical linked to motivation and reward. Purpose = Self-fulfilment = Sense of Achievement = Reward = Dopamine-released. Having a sense of purpose will motivate his transformation if he can find this connection.
Using the book Ikigai to spark a conversation can help the Coachee to see that there are many aspects to living meaningfully and achieving balance. Garcia and Miralles summarised 10 rules of ikigai. These are It would not do justice to the book to only focus on finding meaning in things we do as the singular reason to exist. Passion is too broad to define. We need to see what makes our Coachees light up to discover where their passions lie.
Stay active; don't retire
Take it slow; don't rush or be in a hurry
Don't fill your stomach; eat only up to 80% full
Surround yourself with good friends
Get in shape for your next birthday - exercise regularly
Smile often - Recognise that despite what is wrong with the world, it is still a privilege and the world is still full of possibilities
Reconnect with nature - urban life can be stressful
Practice gratitude - learn to appreciate others
Live in the moment - let go of the past, don't worry about the future.
Follow your ikigai - discover what your passion is and let it drive you.
Other benefits which might encourage a Coachee to define his purpose
In a 2022 study by researchers of the Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health, they concluded that people with the highest sense of purpose indicated the lowest risk of mortality (15.2 percent mortality risk), compared to people with the lowest sense of purpose (36.5 percent mortality risk).
People with a strong sense of purpose are sometimes larger than life and become models to inspire others. Think Mother Teresa, Gandhi and even Elon Musk!
When shared, Purpose becomes a driver for success for businesses. Forbes reported a 2021 study that found that if companies had a clearly articulated widely understood purpose they had better growth as compared with companies which hadn’t developed or leveraged their purpose. "Specifically, 52% of purpose-driven companies experienced over 10% growth compared with 42% of non-purpose-driven companies."
All animals and even plants have purpose but only human beings obsessed with meaning (Maybe bees don't thrive on dopamine) A Coachee may come to us frustrated that no longer finds meaning in what he does or has yet to find meaning which he equates with his purpose in life.
We need to reassure them that not everyone is born knowing their purpose and reviewing and recommitting to one's purpose in life is normal and encouraged. This is especially because priorities in different life stages may change. Which of Ikigai's 4 key spheres offers space for thinking about what we value at that stage - Is it self-fulfilment, achievement, altruism or practical needs? Does having a mission, passion, vocation or a profession matter most in life.
The priorities at that life stage could help us shift thinking about the other spheres eg. someone who has identified something that he may be paid well for and if he can consider how passionate he needs to be, he might then discover ways that the activity can do greater good and will determine to get better at it. Purpose is not carved in stone. This again might move him closer to that centre.
Working through ikigai test also helps us look at what we have with a different lens. I may love cooking Peranakan food, be good at it, think that cooking traditional dishes preserves my dying heritage and I could make a business out of private dining but do I want to? When I compare the joy I have in say creating and crafting artisanal bags which requires volume of sales to merit starting a business, my attempt to achieve ikigai may either convince me that it is not worth doing. But it can lead me to think of how my passions can turn to profits. What other abilities and interests have I overlooked? How can we expand our narratives into multiverses with greater options for endings?
In my above example, the overarching ikigai may not be finding one sweet spot where a single activity can fulfil all the quadrants but a broader perspective about living as a creative whose purpose is to touch people's lives with moments of beauty through functional objects and everyday experiences.
When we combine Ikigai with the Wheel of Life, there is an interesting 3Dimensional perspective of seeing the long term while emphasizing on the Now. Both seek some form of balance and an assessment of what truly is important and a call to action.
Final Thoughts
Coach Mel asked when we were doing Neurological Levels, what was my "I can't"? I said "I can't turn back time." If I could, I would like to turn the clock back 20 years and would start this journey as a coach back then because I am truly enjoying what I am doing and I want to be really good at doing it. But only at this point when I am a noobie, do I carry into the present my passion for helping others see their potential and aiming it at their success. What I am good at, I learnt and practiced. (and need to unlearn a lot, I know.) I live in a post-Covid world with people and the world needs to regain kindness, humanity and confidence. We can and need to do this one conversation at a time. Will I be paid for it? While I have been told "Do what you love and the money will follow?" I am more careful and actually have a business plan as I take a bold step to starting my own learning and development company.
To all intents and purposes I have found ikigai when I wasn't looking for ikigai. I got to this point via my twenties when my purpose was to only have fun at work (Oh, that looks like fun, Let's do it, I told one employer and he still hired me), Up to my late thirties, my purpose was trying to establish my cred in an arts business world, and after a major loss, the reason for working became survival, working for corporations and finding enough meaning to stay on despite tough demands. Twenty years ago, I did not have the same purpose in life which would have made me a good coach. Maybe I needed a good coach then :D
My mentor recently reminded me once again that God has called me "for such a time as this." and that "He knows the plans for me, plans to prosper and not to harm me, but to give me a future and a hope." I believe that applies to everyone. We are here for an indeterminate period of time on this planet. We all have purpose whether we know it or not and that is to discover and do, to find the best use of our time here. While many may think someone is lost without a purpose, life is an adventure with many journeys and voyages and several detours. Not all those who wander are lost. As coaches, we are fellow journeymen, pointing up at the sky to help our coachees see the vast constellation of stars that could bring clarity as to what might guide them toward greater meaning.
Coach Maire, once again. piece out!
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